做夢

如果那是真的，我該會十分高興。

夢想已久的事情終於發生了，我有點驚訝。清楚記得，被你強而有力的手擁抱著，在當中呼吸你的氣息。難以掩飾嘴角不自覺的微笑。那個微笑，到現在我還記得那靦腆的微笑。

我多麼希望那是真的。日思夜想地。

又，想起你十一月生日，祝你生日快樂。我只可以給你我僅餘的祝福，希望你生活愉快。

劃過

今天在辦公室裏靜悄悄的。

輕輕關上桌上的電話，只想潛心做事，不想被鈴聲打擾。

手指頭落力在鍵盤上輸入文字，如是般打上去又刪改，再打又不合意，反反覆覆地改。打印出來後再覆看一篇，又再修改一下。幾次之後，終於完成。一份文件，偏我要琢磨那麼久。

打印好的文件，寫上了今天的日期，九月二十八日。這日子，這日子有點特殊。這日子曾經在我心房裏劃上一個重要記號。和時間相比，我永遠走慢了一步。時間沒有停下來等待我的意思，自顧自地走了。儘管我喊著、嚷著也無補於事。落後於時間太多的我，繼續落後。我明白，我追不回失去的時光，我失去了那些快樂，也許現在只有哀愁伴著我。時間荏苒之際，我心裏頭一直壓著，一直不好受。我沒法準確地告訴別人究竟我現在是怎樣，我只是知道有些時候做人很難，心情不好的時候難受到想死。怎樣過日子，實在是人生最大的課題。時間走得好快，好像一閃神，人和事都驟然變化到令人難以辨認。桃花是否依舊，說真的我不曉得，但人面全非這個我是可以肯定的。

劃過在心底並留個記號，也僅至於此。

---

當手指在"Publish Post按下去之際，臉上已靜靜掛了兩行淚。

Extracts of "The Remains of the Day"

'I feel i should answer you, Mr Stevens. As you say, we may not meet again for many years. Yes, i do love my husband. I didn't at first. I didn't at first for a long time. When I left Darlington all those yars ago, I never realised i was really, truly leaving. I believe I thought of it as simply another ruse, Mr Stevens, to annoy you. It was a shock to come out here and find myself married. For a long time, I was very unhappy, very unhappy indeed. But then year after year went by, there was the war, Catherine grew up, and one day I realised I loved my husband. You spend so much time with someone,yhou find you get used to him. He's so kind, steady man, and yes, Mr Stevens, I've growd to love him.'

Miss Kenton fell silent again for a moment. Then she went on:

'But that doesn't mean to say, of course, there aren't occasions now and then - extreamly desolate occasions - when you think to yourself : "What a terrible mistake I've made with my life." And you get to thinking about a different life, a better life you might have had. For instance, I get to thinking about life I may have had with you, Mr Stevens. And I suppose that's when I get angry over some trivial little thing and leave. But each time I do so, I realise before long - my rightful place is with my husband. After all, there's no turning back the clock now. One can't be forever dwelling on what might have been. One should realise one has as good as most, perhaps better, and be grateful.'

I do not think I responded immediately, for it took me a moment or two to fully digest these words of Miss Kenton. Moreover, as you might appreciate, their implications were such as to provoke a certain degree of sorrow within me. Indeed - why should I not admit it? - at that moment, my heart was breaking. Before long, however, I turned to her and said with a smile:

'You're very correct, Mrs Benn. As you say, it is too late to turn back the clock. Indeed, I would not be able to rest if I thought such ideas were the cause of unhappiness for you and your husband. We must each of us, as you point out, be grateful for what we do have. And from what you tell me, Mrs Benn, you have reason to be contented. In fact, I would venture, what with Mr Benn retiring, and with grand-children on the way, that you and Mr Benn have some extremely happy years before you. You really mustn't let any more foolish ideas come between yourself and the happiness you deserve.'

'Of course, you're right, Mr Stevens. You're so kind.'

'Ah, Mrs Benn, that appears to be the bus coming now.'

I stepped outside and signalled, while Miss Kenton rose and came to the edge of the shelter. Only as the bus pulled up did I glance at Miss Kenton and perceived that her eyes had filled with tears. I smiled and said:

'Now, Mrs Benn, you must take good care of yourself. Many say retirement is the best part of life for a married couple. You must do all you can to make these years happy ones for yourself and your husband. We may never meet again, Mrs Benn, so I would ask you to take good heed of what I am saying.'

'I will, Mr Stevens, thank you. And thank you for the lift. It was so very kind of you. It was so nice to see you again.'

'It was a great pleasure to see you again, Mrs Benn.'

The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro

暑假結束了，莘莘學子又開始上學，努力學習為正道。

我也在這個炎夏沒有"正好眠"，反而我在努力看書。繼之前看了石黑一雄的"Never Let Me Go"，我再看他另一部小說作品 - "The Remains of the Day"。實在是花了好一些時間，我只好歸咎於於自己英文水平不夠高，以致未能飛快地完成。不過看到某些情節也會會心微笑。慢慢也覺得饒有趣味，以完成閱讀為終極目標。

看中文小說長大的我，對中文有著深厚感情的我在完成一部中文小說是沒有難度，甚至說是相當輕易，可以自由選擇速度，若時間不允許，可快讀，若時間允許，可慢讀，細意回味作者的讉詞造句也是樂事。

相對來說，看英文小說雖然不至於困難，但也不見得輕鬆。但我告訴自己學語文沒有借口，沒有困難，只有不用心。就慢慢看，總會看完的。

看到快完成的一刻，內心有一炶不捨得但又很慶幸自己能夠有恒心去完成。

要努力上進到底！

唸唸書

寧靜點點頭，千重始離去，才跨出一步，又回頭道 : 「小靜，那麼久，你還沒喊過我。」

寧靜低下頭，又抬起來定定瞅著他，輕輕嘆道: 「千重。」隨即微笑起來。

千重亦笑笑，安心走了，每一步深深嵌在雪地裡。寧靜一直目送佢，一直牢牢的盯著他不放。北風虎虎的搖天動地，把她的斗蓬捲起高高，遠遠的紅燈籠也晃呀晃的，上面黃煢煢的「吉祥」二字彷彿在朝她笑，愈笑愈遠，愈遠愈模糊。燈籠偶爾會轉個角度，是千重朝這邊眺望，然後又飄飄蕭蕭，像小螢火，在獨自飄歸。

         《停車暫借問》鍾曉陽著

日子

還不到幾天就到九月，日子就如流水一樣過去。工作還是挺忙的。每天的功課沒完沒了，下班的頭也有點暈。生活就是那麼磨人。

 

踏入九月，我相信日子就變得非一般地忙。需要很多精力和心力去做，說實的，還是有一點不安，希望自己可以循步漸進，可以摸著石頭過河。

 

很想放一個幾天的假期，好好輕鬆一下。

輕鬆

五月的艱苦歲月，那令人疲憊的時光，由害怕到擔心到現在得以放鬆。

雖然分數不怎麼好，但只要是合格就好了。

有點興奮、有點失望，十分輕鬆。

終於得到回報 !!

我終於過關了!!!


要繼續努力唄 !!